What do you call a pony with a sore throat? A little horse.Where does Batman go to the bathroom? The batroom.What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.My wife told me to stop acting like a flamingo, so I had to put my foot down.Why do oranges wear sunscreen? So they don't peel.What did one plate say to the other plate? Dinner's on me.Which is faster, hot or cold? Hot, because you can catch cold.I wanted to buy some camo pants but couldn't find any.What kind of candy do astronauts like? Mars bars.What's an egg's favorite vacation spot? New Yolk City.Why couldn't the sunflower ride its bike? It lost its petals.What did the dirt say to the rain? If you keep this up, my name will be mud!.Why did the egg hide? It was a little chicken.Let's be honest, I'm not into summer, fall, or winter cleaning either. I was going to tell you a joke about boxing but I forgot the punch line.What falls, but never needs a bandage? The rain.Now get ready to make some memories filled with laughter with these 70 hilariously funny jokes! Many are one-liners so you can remember them to share and share again, and your kids can retell them to their friends too, maybe even years later. But, deep down, if we are honest, who doesn't smile at corny jokes? Others might even make you laugh so hard you cry, so don't say we didn't warn you. Get ready: Some of what's to come is quite punny. In addition to the 70 jokes below, we've also got dad jokes, jokes for kiddos, mom jokes, and jokes for holidays that you can share them with the youngest person in the room (be sure to bookmark our April Fool's jokes for next year!) And you don't have to worry about these being clean: All of our favorite jokes are fit for kids and adults. You'll be sure to brighten someones day when you unleash a hilarious joke when they least expect it. The man replies: “I’m laughing because I bet those guys in the corner a thousand euros I could piss all over you and your bar and you would still be laughing after I was done.Need a laugh? We found the funniest jokes around to tell all of your friends and family. The man behind the bar asks: “Dude, what are you so happy about? You just lost a bet and a large amount of money.” All of them shake his hand and when he comes back to the bar he hands the bartender his money with a big smile. The man walks over to a table in the corner with a shitload of empty glasses on it and three men sitting behind it. The bartender smiles relieved and says: “Alright mate, I’ll take those 250 euros now.” He hits the glasses, the bottles, the sink, the bartender… Really everything but the cup. So the man gets on his bar seat, undoes his pants and starts pissing all over the bar. The bartender estimates the distance at 2 meter, realizes his bar seats are quite wobbly and then thinks about how difficult it has been lately to keep his bar profitable.
Enjoy!Ī man sat down at the bar, ordered a beer and then said to the bartender: “I bet you 250 euros that I can stand on my bar seat and piss straight in that cup you’ve got back there without missing a single drop.”
Are you the type that makes ridiculous bets in bars as soon as the alcohol kicks in? In that case this joke might sound familiar or inspire you to make a quick buck in a fun way. Time for a little drunk humor then to start the weekend with a smile. This photo has very little to do with this joke but we just like it.
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